Satsang with Swami Narayanananda - The Art of Listening

Opening the Heart Through Everyday Communication

In the classical teachings of Yoga, Bhakti Yoga is the path of devotion and love for the Divine. As our devotion deepens, our sense of separation gradually diminishes. We begin to recognise the presence of the Divine everywhere and in all beings. Our hearts become more open, and love and compassion extend beyond ourselves and those closest to us, allowing us to experience a deeper sense of connection with all life.

One important part of this journey is learning to open the heart. Often, we experience a sense of separation from others. Our hearts can become closed, sometimes for very understandable reasons. We want to protect ourselves from being hurt or disappointed.

The opening of the heart, therefore, is a gradual process. It requires a growing sense of inner stability, safety and peace. As we become more grounded and secure within ourselves, we become increasingly able to open towards others. Love and connection can then develop more naturally.

One of the traditional practices of Bhakti Yoga is listening to the names, stories and glories of the Divine. These devotional practices have great beauty and depth, and offer a way of deepening our love and understanding of God.

We can also take inspiration from this practice and explore how the quality of listening can become a spiritual practice in our everyday relationships. Listening attentively to another person can be an opportunity to open the heart and deepen our connection with one another.

💬 Are we really listening?

If we observe our everyday conversations, we may discover that listening is not always as simple as it seems.

Someone begins to tell us something, and almost immediately our minds become busy. We start thinking about what we are going to say in response. Perhaps their story reminds us of something that happened to us, and we feel an urge to share our own experience. Or we begin thinking about what advice we can offer and how we might solve their problem.

While the other person is still speaking, our attention has already moved elsewhere.

Sometimes this becomes obvious through interruption. Someone begins to share an experience, and we jump in with our own story. Instead of allowing them the space to express themselves, we turn the conversation towards ourselves.

For example, a friend might tell us that they lost their purse while shopping. Before they have finished explaining what happened, we interrupt to describe the time we lost our wallet and how much money we lost. Without intending to, we have shifted the attention away from them and towards ourselves.

This is a common habit, but it can prevent genuine connection.

🧘 Listening and Raja Yoga

There is also a connection here with Raja Yoga, the path of mental discipline and meditation. One of the important practices of Raja Yoga is learning to observe the movements of the mind without automatically identifying with or reacting to every thought that arises.

We can practise this during everyday conversations. As we listen, we notice the thoughts, feelings and impulses that arise in our minds. Perhaps we feel the urge to interrupt, offer advice, defend ourselves or bring the conversation back to our own experience. Rather than immediately following these impulses, we pause and observe them. Through awareness and discrimination, we can begin to recognise which thoughts and reactions are helpful and which we can simply let go. In this way, listening becomes an opportunity to practise greater self-awareness and mastery of the mind.

💛 The gift of giving someone space

Imagine what it feels like when someone listens to you without interrupting, correcting you or immediately offering advice. They give you their full attention. They are present, interested and genuinely curious about what you are saying.

Something quite valuable happens in that space.

We begin to relax. We feel that we can express ourselves more freely. We have time to explore what we are thinking and feeling, and sometimes even discover that our initial understanding of a situation was incomplete. As we speak, things become clearer.

Often, what we need most when facing a difficulty is not someone to provide a solution. We need someone who can simply be present with us, listen and give us the space to discover our own understanding.

🌱 Listening and the wisdom within

There is also a connection here with Jnana Yoga, the path of knowledge and self-enquiry. In the teachings of Vedanta, the wisdom we seek is ultimately discovered through turning our attention inward and enquiring into the nature of our own Self.

When someone gives us the space to speak without interruption or immediate advice, something valuable can happen. We have an opportunity to become quieter, to examine our thoughts and feelings, and to gain a clearer understanding of our own experience. Rather than depending entirely on someone else to provide an answer, we may discover a deeper understanding for ourselves.

In this way, attentive listening can support the qualities of self-reflection and discernment that are important in Jnana Yoga.

As teachers, friends or family members, we do not always need to have the answer. Sometimes the most valuable thing we can offer another person is our presence.

🤲 Listening as Karma Yoga

There is also a beautiful connection here with Karma Yoga, the yoga of selfless action.

When we listen attentively, without immediately bringing in our own stories, opinions or advice, we are offering something to another person: our time, attention and presence.

For those moments, we put aside our own desire to be heard, to demonstrate our knowledge or to solve the other person’s problem. We simply make space for them.

This can become a practical expression of Karma Yoga when we listen with a spirit of selflessness, without expecting anything in return. We are learning to serve another person through the simple act of giving them our attention.

🕊️ Listening and Ahimsa

Finally, attentive listening is closely connected with Ahimsa, the principle of non-violence.

Ahimsa is not limited to our physical actions. It also applies to the way we speak and communicate. When we dismiss someone’s experience, judge them prematurely or repeatedly interrupt them, we may prevent them from feeling heard and understood.

Listening with patience, sensitivity and respect is one way of bringing Ahimsa into our everyday relationships.

✨ One practice, many dimensions of Yoga

What is interesting about this simple practice of listening is that it brings together several aspects of the classical teachings of Yoga.

• 🧡 Bhakti Yoga: We practise opening the heart through love, compassion and connection.
• 🧘 Raja Yoga: We observe our thoughts and reactions, developing greater awareness and mastery of the mind.
• 🌱 Jnana Yoga: We cultivate self-reflection, discrimination and a deeper understanding of ourselves.
• 🤲 Karma Yoga: We offer our attention as an act of selfless service, without expecting anything in return.
• 🕊️ Ahimsa: We practise non-violence through patience, sensitivity and respect in our communication.

This illustrates an important principle of the Sivananda tradition: the different paths of Yoga are not separate or competing approaches. They complement and strengthen one another. Even an ordinary activity such as listening can become an opportunity to put these teachings into practice.

🌿 A simple practice for everyday life

Developing the art of listening begins with awareness. The next time someone speaks to you, notice what happens in your mind. Do you immediately begin preparing your response? Do you start comparing their experience with your own? Do you feel an urge to advise, correct or solve?

When you notice these habits, try something different. Pause. Allow the other person to finish. Give them your attention. Be curious about what they are saying, rather than thinking about what you are going to say next.

This does not mean that we must listen indefinitely or ignore our own needs. We can establish boundaries and bring conversations to a close when necessary, while still doing so with kindness and respect.

Listening is a skill that develops through practice. It may seem like a small thing, but its effect on our relationships can be profound.

When we put aside, even temporarily, the constant activity of our own minds, something else becomes possible: a connection that comes not so much from thinking, but from the heart.

Perhaps this is one of the ways we can bring the spirit of Yoga into everyday life. We learn to open our hearts not only through prayer, chanting and devotion, but also through the way we meet another human being.

Sometimes, the greatest gift we can offer someone is simply to listen.